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Wicca for Beginners: How to Find Your Wiccan God and Goddess

Updated on November 15, 2016
WiccanSage profile image

A Wiccan of 25 years, Sage likes to put her background as a writer and teacher to use by helping people learn about this NeoPagan path.

Finding your God and Goddess in Wicca

Your Wiccan God and Goddess are really what it’s all about. That’s what the rituals are for. That’s why we celebrate the Wheel of the Year. That’s why we pray and meditate.

Anyone of any religion can love nature. Anyone of any religion can cast spells. Anyone of any religion can work with tarot cards or crystals and such. None of these things particularly make anyone Wiccan—in fact, plenty of people who do these things are not at all Wiccan. People have been doing these things long before Wicca existed.

However, fostering a relationship with the Gods as a Wiccan, connecting through Wiccan ritual, honoring them through the cycles of the seasons and by the way you live your life—this is what truly makes one Wiccan.

Finding your Goddess and God

Wiccan Gods and Goddesses.
Wiccan Gods and Goddesses. | Source

The Process of Becoming Wiccan

13 Moons to Becoming Wiccan: How to Make the Transition from Theory to Practice
13 Moons to Becoming Wiccan: How to Make the Transition from Theory to Practice

Becoming Wiccan is not about spells, or crystals, or tools-- it's about your relationship with your Gods, and how you live your life. If you're craving something more than all the Wicca 101 books that lay out the same basic information over and over, go deeper with my book: 13 Moons to Becoming Wiccan: How to Make the Transition from Theory to Practice.


Patron God and Matron Goddess

Wicca is traditionally polytheistic, and many Wiccans will speak of their ‘patrons’… that is, a patron God, and a matron Goddess. Patrons and matrons (or just ‘patrons’ when referring to both) are the specific God(s) or Goddesses(s) a Wiccan honors and works with.

There’s no rule about patrons. I’ve known people to have as few as one, and as many as four or five. They are usually of the same pantheon (not always, though mixing pantheons is always tricky and never should be taken lightly).

The benefit of being in a relationship with patrons is that it gets fully developed. In your ongoing worship and serving your patron Gods, you get to know them intimately. In taking you under their wing like that, a God or Goddess will teach you a great deal over time and you can learn many lessons from them.

Sometimes you can be with the same patrons for life—other times, you’ll be with them for a time (usually a few years) before you reach the ‘end of the road’ with them. This is not a terrible thing, when a God or Goddess ‘cuts you loose’; it’s not because you did anything wrong, but because you’re ready to move on. This is when you've benefited from the relationship all you can, and they realize that you are ready for a new patron—a new teacher, who can bring you yet to the next level of lessons that need to be learned.

Having a patron does not mean you need to exclude all other Gods. In Wicca, we don’t believe the Gods are jealous or have the ‘have no other Gods before me’ policies as found in other religions you may be more familiar with. It’s okay to go to a ritual that worships another God, or to hold a ritual to a different Goddess if you wish for specific purpose.

It’s just that our patrons will be a special, ongoing relationship.

Signs May Be Subtle

A friend was finding peacock feathers for months. When she ignored the feathers, she came home to find a peacock on her roof (they're not even common where she lives). She found out it was the 'calling card' of a Goddess who was reaching out to her.
A friend was finding peacock feathers for months. When she ignored the feathers, she came home to find a peacock on her roof (they're not even common where she lives). She found out it was the 'calling card' of a Goddess who was reaching out to her.

Being Called by the Gods

A lot of Wiccans will tell you they did not choose their Gods, but that their Gods chose them.

Like many religions describe it, it feels like ‘a calling’, and as such it’s hard to explain. Many Wiccans feel they get signs of some sort. This may be an image or animal associated with a certain God or Goddess popping up a lot unexpectedly, dreams or visions. Often these are accompanied by those gut feelings, or an inner voice.

In my own personal experience, I had a vision— I’d already been meditating for years for health and stress-reduction purposes. I had also spend the last year as a religious seeker, learning about different religions and wasn’t sure about which path to take. When I was doing my normal meditation one night, I went particularly deep and my Goddess came to me, told me who she was, introduced me to my God and they welcomed me on the Wiccan path.

Where is this calling coming from? Is it truly a divine being who has chosen you and is communicating with you? Is it an internal, a simple ‘knowing’ in your own brain of what you need? I have my own ideas, but the truth is—no one knows.

Once you become Wiccan, though, it’s something you should look out for.

Not Getting a Calling?

If you don’t feel the calling, you certainly should not feel bad. For one thing, maybe you’re just too new to Wicca and not ready to work with a personal deity yet. For another thing, perhaps you are just missing the signs. Don’t get discouraged—the deities aren't rejecting you.

You may need to simply employ a little initiative. Start seeking deities, and approach them to see which ones will have you (or have been waiting for you to come to them in your own time).

In other words, you don’t have to sit around and wait until you feel they've come to you—you can meet them half-way.

Guided Meditation to Attune with the Goddess:

Recommended Books for Wiccans:

Finding your Wiccan God and/or Goddess

Whether you feel the calling or not, there are things you should do to find patrons and foster that newly-growing relationship.

Do your research. Read, read and read some more to learn all you can about your Gods and/or Goddesses you think might be calling you. If you think you're getting a sign, look them up to see who they might be coming from. If you don’t feel a calling, this could be a good way to start figuring out the best road for you to take—starting with whichever pantheons catch your attention most is probably a good place to begin. Then see which Gods and Goddesses jump out at you.

You want to really acquaint yourself with God/desses initially. Be careful of Neo-Pagan books that try to fit all Gods into one mold and all Goddesses into one mold. You’re better off reading ancient mythology books that deliberately remain vague so not to be too specific.

Also beware of modern books that re-write myths to ‘white wash’ them to make people feel more comfortable (this happens often with ‘rape myths’ or other myths that are particularly violent and sad). Some Pagan authors prefer feel-good versions of the old myths, but they’re missing the point. Sometimes they have tough lessons for us, or they convey them harshly through myths—to change the myths is to change (and often lose) the less. Gods are not meant to be human ideals for us to live up to, they are meant for us to learn something. Remember that the myths are symbolism and allegory; your Gods are not actually raping and killing. If a myth makes you uncomfortable, don’t try to avoid it—it only means there is a lesson there that you probably need to explore further.

Poll for Wiccans (old and new)

Did you ever feel like you got a 'calling'?

See results

Pray to your God and Goddess

Wiccans pray too.
Wiccans pray too. | Source

Connecting with Deities in Wicca

Study pantheons and cultures. This requires more reading and studying, of course, but it’s necessary. Wicca is a modern religion, and despite what some shoddy scholarship will tell you, all Pagan religions are not based on that particular modern model.

Your Gods and Goddesses are used to being treated a certain way by the ancient cultures that revered them. You’ll want to uphold that expectation, just as if you were inviting a king or queen of another country into your home you wouldn’t want to offend them. You’d want to be the perfect host. Likewise, you want to be the perfect host if you are seeking a God/dess to come into your life.

You don’t want to make an offering of the harvest dinner that includes meat to a vegetarian Goddess. You don’t want to place something your God might find offensive on the altar. If your God is a warrior God, then embracing a life of pacifism and speaking out against war and violence is probably not a good idea. Every time you call war ‘evil’ it’s like a slap in the face to that deity. Not that you have to become violent in your own life or that you have to be eager for wars—but if you can’t appreciate that war might sometimes be a necessary action, perhaps a warrior God isn’t for you. If you truly believe in pacifism, you should probably find a God that advocates pacifism instead of trying to twist a warrior God to fit your mold.

Talk to the deities. If you feel called, begin praying to that deity. If you feel you wish to be called by a certain deity, pray to him or her. Pray for signs, or more specific signs. Pray for answers to come to you. Invite them into your lives, and into your heart.

Meditate—they say if praying is talking to a God, meditation is listening. Try to hear through that ‘inner voice’ what it is they are saying to you.

Set Up a Shrine


Begin Honoring Your Deities

A relationship takes time to build, and this is no different with Gods. If you feel you’ve found the right Gods, or your patrons, you should begin honoring those Gods.

The best way to start this is by building a small shrine and going to it daily. It doesn’t have to be elaborate: something to represent your God and/or Goddess (a statue, a candle, a stone, image, etc.), some candles and/or incense to burn during worship, and a cup or bowl for libations and offerings.

Go to your altar—daily is best, even if only for 5 minutes. Say a short prayer, hold a moment of silence, make a simple offering (some milk, honey, a flower, dried herbs, a portion of your breakfast or dinner, etc.).

You might want to find out if your God or Goddess is associated with any sabbat, or has a special annual festival from the culture in which he or she originates. Celebrate it—do something special. Again, it doesn’t have to be elaborate, but perhaps you could hold a ritual, go on a nature walk, have a feast, make a special offering (such as donating food in the name of a harvest Goddess).

Keep it up—books will tell you a lot about your Gods and Goddesses, but the only way to really get to know them is by making them a part of your life.


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    • OldRoses profile image

      Caren White 2 years ago from Franklin Park, NJ

      Thank you so much for this hub! When I set on on the Wiccan path many years ago, my understanding is that it was a religion of duality. Male/Female God/Goddess. But my experience has been more of a pantheon as you described. My calling has always been to the gods and goddesses of nature. My gardens have been my alters. I'm delighted (and a little relieved) to discover that it is alright to align with many gods and goddesses rather than just two. Voted enthusiastically up and shared.

    • WiccanSage profile image

      Mackenzie Sage Wright 2 years ago

      Thanks OldRoses, I'm glad I could shed some light on the subject for you. It's true that Wicca is a religion focused on duality, but not on the point to exclusivity. Gods and Goddesses connect to us based on our own needs, so we can find balance. That's the whole point of duality-- finding a healthy balance in all things. I appreciate your comments and your votes!

    • billybuc profile image

      Bill Holland 2 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Passing this on to my son. I hope you are well my friend. Have a great week.

    • WiccanSage profile image

      Mackenzie Sage Wright 2 years ago

      Thanks Billy, you too! Have a good one.

    • CMHypno profile image

      CMHypno 2 years ago from Other Side of the Sun

      Interesting hub WiccanSage and thanks for all the advice on connecting with a deity. As a spiritual medium I work with my guides, which probably more or less equates to the same thing, and the one thing I learned is to let go of any preconceptions or thoughts of what type of guide or patron deity you want. Who comes through for you is who comes through for you, and no amount of trying turns a Native American Guide into a Greek Goddess lol!

    • WiccanSage profile image

      Mackenzie Sage Wright 2 years ago

      That's a very good point, CMHypno, those pre-conceived notions and longings can always trip us up. Thanks for contributing, and thanks for your comment.

    • myconsumerboard profile image

      myconsumerboard 2 years ago

      I don't know enough about Wiccan so this was interesting and educational. Thanks!

    • WiccanSage profile image

      Mackenzie Sage Wright 2 years ago

      Thank you myconsumerboard, I'm glad you could learn something here. I appreciate your comments!

    • misterhollywood profile image

      John Hollywood 2 years ago from Hollywood, CA

      What a great beginners guide - thank you for making this available to us all!

    • WiccanSage profile image

      Mackenzie Sage Wright 2 years ago

      Thanks misterhollywood, I appreciate your comments.

    • Nigel Morris9 2 years ago

      I really don't have all material like candles and stuff. And I'm not allowed So I won't make a very good wiccan

    • WiccanSage profile image

      Mackenzie Sage Wright 2 years ago

      Hi Nigel; you don't need candles, or stuff. They're just tools for focus. Great atmosphere.

    • Star 2 years ago

      This was very helpful. I'm glad I found this. I am starting my journey to find if wicca is the religion for me.

    • sageofhope 14 months ago

      Thank You for making this website available to us. I am new in the path, and I love reading the material that is in this pages.

    • cam8510 profile image

      Chris Mills 13 months ago from Colorado Springs, CO until the end of March

      I just found this article on another site. I wanted to let you know about it. the URL for your article there is

    • Soluna 13 months ago

      I feel a sudden warmth when thinking of a certain goddess. Could that be a sign that she's my matron?

    • Visitor 12 months ago

      I really appreciate your site. Your website helps others regarding the subject. I have only listened to a little, but realized it was wonderful.



    • rhianna 11 months ago

      Im good friends with someone who has practiced wicca for many years,she senses someone evil is attached to me and suggests I start practicing and learning about wicca myself, is there anything else I should know to get started?

    • Kaela 8 months ago

      Do you know what raven or crow feathers could symbolize, if anything? I've been finding them all over and was wondering if it means anything

    • leisa 7 months ago

      The day I announced I was a electric witch when I dreamed that night I had several witches come to me the gave me their names said they were glad to meet me an said they were there to help an guide me im New to this but have come to see I have always been a witch an im glad I know where I belong

    • Erika H. 6 months ago

      When I was a little kid, I used to talk to a wind god I believe. I told my mom his name, she looked it up and it was the name of an uncommonly known wind god. I believe that is how she found wicca (and is now a devout practitioner) and I'm hoping to be able to find a god or goddess very soon that I'm able to honor and learn from, this was so helpful thank you.

    • kayla 6 months ago

      I need help, I am new to the practice. could you help?

    • WiccanSage profile image

      Mackenzie Sage Wright 5 months ago

      Thanks Cam, I appreciate it.

    • WiccanSage profile image

      Mackenzie Sage Wright 5 months ago

      Hi Rhianna; I'm sorry I'm getting to this so late. As a Wiccan, I don't believe in the evil/vs/good type of universe, but I do believe we can occasionally have something negative, be it a being or more often energy, clinging to us. Cleansing rituals such as uncrossing rituals or purification baths or smudging and meditations to clear away negativity can help, there are many ways to go about it.

      I would not suggest you consider Wicca unless you truly are interested in the religion. Anything you can do to cleanse/purify yourself can be done as a Wiccan or a non-Wiccan; we don't have any special advantages.

    • WiccanSage profile image

      Mackenzie Sage Wright 5 months ago

      Depends; does it have a special meaning to you? Do you live where there is a migration pattern? If you do believe they are signs of some sort, it's more important you get to the bottom of what they represent to you.

    • WiccanSage profile image

      Mackenzie Sage Wright 5 months ago

      Hi Kayla; what exactly is it you're looking for? If you prefer I just opened my website and I'll be posting a monthly 'mailbag' for Q&A... you can submit questions at there is an email form, or you can email me direct at Please let me know what specific topics you need help with and I'll do my best.

    • Xavier DAH 2 months ago from Utah

      you are helpfull as always wiccansage

    • Xavier DAH 2 months ago from Utah

      Dear Wiccansage.

      i finally found out who my wiccan gods/goddesses are but is it good to have more or less gods/goddesses because i have 5 i hope thats normal

    • WiccanSage profile image

      Mackenzie Sage Wright 2 months ago

      Hi Dark! There is no 'normal' actually, so it's not bad at all. There are people who worship multiple deities and people who worship one (or none). I don't think it's good or bad; it is what it is... do you feel you benefit from having a relationship with 5 God/desses? If not, then it's up to you to decide what to do. If it works for you, then it's fine. :o)

    • AMF 2 months ago

      Thanks, I can now see I have had a calling, recently.

    • Aaron B. 7 weeks ago

      Thank you for writing about this!

      I was another person who wasn't sure if it was okay that I felt drawn to or work with more than just two god/desses.I already have two patrons, but I've always felt drawn to trying to also work with and/or try to potentially start a relationship with another goddess from my first pantheon, along with a goddess from different pantheon as well. It's nice to actually see someone else confirm that it's okay to follow more than two god/desses in Wicca.

    • Dark DAH 7 weeks ago

      thanks for the help wiccansage you're the best ^_^

    • Chaf 7 weeks ago


    • WiccanSage profile image

      Mackenzie Sage Wright 6 weeks ago

      Hi Aaron; yep, I am a firm believer in following your own personal gnosis when it comes to the deities. It's always nice to find someone else who has shared the same revelations. Thanks for your comments!

    • WiccanSage profile image

      Mackenzie Sage Wright 6 weeks ago

      Thanks Dark! Glad I could help.

    • WiccanSage profile image

      Mackenzie Sage Wright 6 weeks ago

      Not sure what you think doesn't 'work'... my religion 'works' fine for me, if you can apply the word 'work' to a religion. Thanks for commenting!

    • Valerie 2 days ago

      Thank you.. I needed this.. I've learned so much..

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