A Wiccan of 25 years, Sage likes to put her background as a writer and teacher to use by helping people learn about this NeoPagan path.
Greetings, Wiccan Teens!
Greetings, young seekers. I take it you’re here because you’re interested in Wicca, but you’re pretty sure your parents (or guardians) won’t have it under their roof. This can be very disheartening, when they’re unable to see what a beautiful, uplifting, and spiritually fulfilling religion Wicca is.
Maybe they don’t know much about Wicca and would be unwilling to learn. Maybe Wicca is against their own belief system. Whatever the case, let me just say—I feel for you. That sucks.
The teen years are a time for self-exploration and self-expression. Part of that is exploring and expressing one’s spiritual beliefs. You might not even end up Wiccan for more than a few months or years—that doesn’t mean you can’t learn something from it, or something about yourself in the process.
But, as the epic song says, ”You can’t always get what you want.” If your parents (or guardians—be they grandparents, older siblings, aunts and uncles, even foster parents) are against you learning about or practicing Wicca, here’s what you should do.
Be Respectful of Your Parents' Feelings
You might want to hide books, or go out for rituals in private places where you can’t be found, or hide tools in crawl spaces. You might want to sneak out to Pagan shops or local festivals without letting your parents know. I can’t over-stress how bad of an idea this is.
For one thing, when you sneak around you blow all trust. It doesn’t make you look good, and it sure doesn't make Wicca look any better. After all, if they think Wicca encourages sneaking and disobedience, they’re only going to hate it even more.
The fact is, Wicca does not encourage sneaking and disobedience—our religion encourages acting responsibly, respecting other people’s rights and beliefs, even when you don’t get what you want. You should take this opportunity to do the most Wiccan thing possible: respect your parents. Respect their home, their beliefs, their authority, and their rules. That’s the responsible thing.
What You Can (Ethically) Do:
Sure, it can be interesting in learning about magic, about energy, about full-blown rituals and ritual tools—but those things are just part of Wicca. Most of what being a Wiccan is involves living your day-to-day life spiritually.
Just because your parents won't let you have the flashy tools, or because you can't read 'spell books' at all, does not mean you're at a disadvantage! There are many, many things you can do that are highly beneficial to your spiritual growth. These are things that will serve you well on your path in life. These are things that any new Wiccan should do.
These things may not be as overtly 'Wiccan', but they are no less Wiccan, no less, important, and no less fulfilling if you give them a chance. When you do finally 'pick up the broomstick' (as we say), any of these activities will have you better prepared than any Wicca book or tool ever could.
What's more, your parents probably won't mind most of these. You can be on the path to personal spiritual development without parents even realizing it.
Any Learning Is Good in Wicca
- Read a lot. Wicca is a religion that values learning and knowledge. There are a lot of books you can read to help you that don’t mention the word “Wicca” at all. Read psychology books and sociology books to learn about human nature, the human mind, and human cultures. Read about mythology—learn about the Old Gods that Wiccans worship today. Read history books and learn about different Pagans and tribal cultures. Read about health and wellness. Read about gardening—learn about herbs, both how to grow them and how to use them. Read about other religions—including your parent’s religion. Get to know it better.
- Journal. Nothing can help you learn more about yourself and how you are growing/evolving than keeping a journal; and it doesn't have to have a pentagram engraved on it to be religiously significant. Over time, journaling can help you see where your growth is stagnant, and where you keep making the same mistakes over and over. A journal can help you keep your thoughts organized when it comes to the world and your experiences in it.
You can also record important information as you study—for example, you might write down the name of a myth you found particularly striking, or you may have read a gardening book that teaches you how to grow your own sage in a flower pot. That information may come in handy for you when you move out on your own and begin to practice more formally.
Wicca Is a Religion
- Pray. Stripped down to its bare essence, Wicca is a religion. You don’t need the spells, you don’t need the tools or even the circles—you could be Wiccan alone on a deserted island after a shipwreck with no supplies at all if you had to. Tools don’t make a Wiccan; they are just tools. A relationship with deity is more to the point.
Respect your parents' religious beliefs, respect their God if they have one, go to church or Bible studies if they request it. But no one can tell you who to pray to in your own heart.
- Attune. A big part of Wicca is attuning yourself to the natural world. That’s not even something you need Wiccan 101 books to do. That’s something that’s largely driven by instinct. It can start as simply as sitting outside for a little while every day and noticing the natural things around you—the slant of the shadow at that time of day and year, the color of the leaves on the tree, the types of birds flying around. Notice the weather—the feel of the air on your skin, the sun on your face. Start noticing the cycles of the moon at night, and the lengthening or shortening days after the equinoxes and solstices pass.
You might find yourself getting the urge to get more into nature—plant a garden, even if it’s just a small one. Go camping. Take hikes. Swim in lakes and oceans.
This may lead you to think about what to put into your body—Doritos and Pepsi vs. an apple and a glass of filtered water. You may start feeling inclined to get off the computer and video games and out into the fresh air more often, to use your body. This inner longing to let go of the hold that many of our modern conveniences have on you in favor of more natural ways can really be beneficial to your health, and you may notice you start feeling a lot better. This is good—Wicca is about finding balance of mind, spirit, and body. Don’t neglect your body, it’s your temple.
More Great Hobbies for Teens Who Want to Be Wiccan
- Anything artistic/creative
- Studying history, cultures, religion
- Working with animals
- Anything in nature: camping, hiking, gardening, etc.
- Studying sciences like botany, gemology, physics, astronomy, etc.
- Volunteering and helping others
- Physical activities: dance, yoga, martial arts, etc.
Great Guided Meditations for Wiccan Teens
Keep Working on You
- Meditate. Meditation is great for so many things—relieving stress, finding inner peace, improved memory, and mental discipline. Wicca is a religion that actively encourages people to make meditation a part of their lives. Start taking five minutes per day just to sit quietly and let yourself be aware of your own breath. If you can do that for just 5 to 15 minutes each day, you will be more than ready to jump into more serious and advanced rituals in Wicca when you’re ready for more formal practice.
- Wait. As hard as waiting can be, consider this time your own personal test from the Gods—testing your patience, testing your dedication, testing your ability to respect other people’s beliefs, testing your understanding that ethical behavior is important to your own development—development as a Wiccan, and as a human being. These are going to be lessons that will benefit you in the future, so even though it’s hard, take that opportunity and use it. Time passes, and things are always changing. Learn to live in the now, focus on making the best of that, and one day you’ll find yourself living the life you want, your own way.
Merry part for now, and I’m sure if Wicca is meant to be your path, we’ll merry meet again.
This article is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge. Content is for informational or entertainment purposes only and does not substitute for personal counsel or professional advice in business, financial, legal, or technical matters.
© 2013 Mackenzie Sage Wright
Mackenzie Sage Wright (author) on September 24, 2020:
Hi, hon. I know words can hurt sometimes, but sometimes we can't change others; the best thing we can do is change how we react to them. Try to have more patience with your parents' jokes and rudeness. You don't have to convince them or explain anything to them (and it probably won't do any good), so why bother? At best, just remind them sometimes that it hurts when people you love mock you... but also develop a sense of humor about things and be okay with the fact that your parents believe differently than you do.
Mackenzie Sage Wright (author) on September 24, 2020:
I say let them make jokes and try not to take it personally. It alleviates tension. Maybe joke back a little about it. Sometimes it's best not to take ourselves too seriously, lol. Practice your spirituality in private, when they eventually realize you're serious about it but the jokes don't bother you they'll probably stop. If you feel they're really crossing the line, you could always try to talk to them and tell them that they're hurting your feelings. But most of the time I use these kinds of situations to develop my own tolerance and patience.
Mackenzie Sage Wright (author) on September 24, 2020:
If you think she'll listen tell her you're telling her your interest because you trust her and don't want to sneak around, ask her to read a good book or website before making any final decisions. Try not to let the conversation get heated and let her know you respect her opinions you just want to make sure she's informed about what you are actually talking about before making any choices. If this is something she's dead-set against, I would respect her feelings and put off formal study for later. There are still things you can do without breaking any rules, I suggest checking out this article:https://exemplore.com/wicca-witchcraft/Teen-Wiccan...
Bella on August 12, 2020:
it's still me, but i just want to ask how do i tell them that i'm not stupid, and that Faeries can be real, Deities can be real, magick IS real. how do i tell them that i believe in candle, energy, nature, most types of magic and that its not a joke to me anymore, that it's not funny. how do i tell them that without being told to go to my room for how impolite this sounds. HOW? thank you Mackenzie!!!
Bella on August 12, 2020:
i told my parents that i have decided to be Wiccan, and they understood...but. first let me tell you their beliefs, my mom believes in healing energies and believes in reincarnation. my dads almost the same, just cut the energies. they both believe about a fair amount of Wicca things, they just dont know it. let's get back to the But. but... they always make stupid jokes about witchcraft, telling me like, " oooh, you should make some magic potion, you should make it to grow some fairy wings and fly to neverland." and then if i say i want to be alone to practice, they laugh behind my back as soon as i turn. what do i do?
izabella on April 29, 2020:
i haven't told my parents yet. my mom found one of my old research pages and said that i needed to grow up and that if I even for a second thought that anything along the lines of witchcraft was real, I was wrong. I've been in the "broom closet" for about a month now and before that, i did about 2 months' worth of research. how do i tell her? should tell her? and it's not only me, but both I and my sister have also been in the closet for about a month. I'm worried that she will find out and throw all of our things out. help!!
vicki on April 14, 2020:
ever since i was a toddler i've been so fascinated with nature, stones, candles, energies and how i can find different ways to connect to the earth. the feeling of somehow coming to an understanding with nature thats almost hard to explain. living in a christian household has always suppressed my urges to practice what i believe which triggers so much anxiety in me. im 20 now, beliefs and connections stronger than ever - and im still not allowed to practice in my house or even mention it to my parents.
Mackenzie Sage Wright (author) on March 17, 2020:
((hugs)) sorry Emma that your parents are having a hard time with this. I'm sure they're doing what they think is best for you. I hope that until you're old enough to make these decisions for yourself these tips will help you explore your spirituality in a way that will satisfy you without offending/going against your parents. Best of luck.
emma on March 16, 2020:
my parents are christan and i got a huge spanking for telling them so now i have to lie that i dont belive it anymore i wish i had somewhere to go
Mazilyn on February 16, 2020:
I live with my mother, and her side of the family is christian, but my fathers side beliefs lay within the paganistic side of things. I love Wicca and I love it's practices, it makes me feel whole and like I've found myself. But my mother's always told me that's it's satanic and tries to make me feel terrible because "god wouldn't approve".
I can't live with my father as he's in Scotland, I'm in Australia, and it'd be to difficult to move during my last year of school.
Somebody should make a wicca community for teens struggling with this, somewhere we can just share some of our practices of advice on how to get started teens tend to explain to other teens better then adults do XD
Julia on February 05, 2020:
My parents think it's a joke. When I told them I talked with trees when I was little and they laughed but I really did. When I told them I had a spirit wolf inside me they said OK but I heard them talking with other people and they said that I was getting a kick out of lying. I stopped with the wolf 'Nonsense' in public but I know it's true. I still talk to my plants. I fell like if I tell them that I'm considering being Wiccan they might think the same things. If I tell my grandma, who's Christian, she would send me back to my old cathlic school, take me to church every day, and spray my house and room with holy water. I need help knowing what books to check out from the library withough drawing attention to myself. Thanks, Julia
Cassi Navarrete on December 15, 2019:
Most of the literature concerning Wicca is very reassuring that adult Wiccans do not try to recruit underage followers and your article is initially in line with this attitude...you even go so far as to say “don’t hide “....”from your parents “. BUT then you encourage young people to “pray to their gods” while ACTING like they are praying to the one true and living God. That, ma’am is the same thing as lying. And, as ANY kind of advice giver or leader... you will have to answer to God for the blood on your hands one day.
Julia on December 07, 2019:
My moms mormon and I've been a wicca teen for more than 2 years, SEND HELP!
Bonnie on November 20, 2019:
My family are Christian and think Wicca is all satanic bullsh!t. What do I do?
Menuha on November 17, 2019:
My parents think this is all a joke.What do I do?
Savannah on October 16, 2019:
I'm afraid that if I have a different religion than my parents, we'll be seperated when we die. I'm really anxious about this.
Chloe on June 03, 2019:
I want my parents to let me to witchcraft i have not told them yet and i don't know if i want to tell them or my friends i'm very scared cause i did some reserch and it said they burn witches is that true?
Emma on February 20, 2019:
I'm worried about the same thing to but we both have slightly different problems on the way you said down below. I hope both of us will be able to find a way past our problem and that soon we will be able to choose what you want to do with our lives ( even though we have already started choosing our paths).
I hope you read this message, Emma
Emma on February 20, 2019:
My Family is against Wicca and my dad calls witches devil worshipers I'm scared that he will found out that I'm a witch and that I'm worried that he might find out. I never chose to be raised as a Christen and I never chose that life either I feel like I don't belong in the Catholic life sometimes. I hope you will give advice as no one ever understands me.
Scarlett on November 20, 2018:
I find it pretty saddening that my parents won’t accept my religion in their house. My dad is EXTREMELY christian and thinks that wicca is devil worship and black magic. A little while ago, he came across some drawings of pentagrams in my sketchbook, he got super upset at me and told me “That’s witchcraft, i don’t want to see that evil stuff ever again.” I felt really lost and scared, i tried talking to the goddess, but i don’t feel any better. Luckily, i have a best friend who shares my religion. She is a witch, so whenever i have a sleepover with her, we can talk to eachother about wicca and feel comfortable about it, knowing that nobody will judge us. But i just wish it was the same way with my parents.
Scarlett on November 20, 2018:
I was going to the bathroom, and i left my sketchbook on the counter. (I have wicca sketches in it), and when i got out, my dad was very upset. He told me that he didn’t want to see any of that evil witchcraft ever again, and that we are a christian-only family. I feel so scared, i know he isn’t going to believe the fact that wicca is a harmless religion or the fact that i’m not practicing black magic. What should i do?
Diana on October 02, 2018:
Summer Lovell (and others thinking about coming out of the broom closet) -
Know that you are not alone. Many of us - including myself - have the same problem. If and when you are ready to tell your parents, there are a few things you can do.
First, pick a good time to have this conversation. Do NOT tell them when they are angry or stressed. Pick a time when they are relaxed and open to talking.
Second, make sure you are ready. Have you researched? Do you know what your getting into? Take type to get to know the Craft before you come out of the broom closet. It will make answering the questions you're sure to receive so much easier.
Third, start by asking them to listen to you. Let them know you'd like to explain witchcraft before they jump to conclusions about how "evil it is."
Fourth, respect their decision. If they agree to let you practice, great! If not, however, don't sneak in wands and books. This behavior will only increase their dislike for Wicca, as Ms. Sage said in her article. Use this as a time to better yourself. Read about all kinds of other things. Set goals for your future and focus on school. Ms. Sage makes many good suggestions in this article about what to do if your parents won't let you practice. Follow what she says.
Fifth, your parent's can't tell you who to pray to or what holidays you can observe. You can pray to the Goddess, and your parents don't have to know. You can go stargazing on Midsummer's Eve - also called Litha - and your parents will think it's just because the sky is pretty when really it's so much more than that. Find your own subtle ways to practice the Craft.
Remember that witchcraft is not just about having the newest tools and the best spells. It's about living your life in harmony and respect for the Earth and those who live there. You don't need to be out of the broom closet to do that.
And never forget that you are not alone. Others are going through the same things.
No matter what happens, you are a witch.
Summer lovell on September 27, 2018:
My dad does not know that i am a witch but my mom is kinda of suspecting it,she thinks i am only into witchcraft alittle but she said that she will not have anything witchcraft in her home....i do not want to tell her because she said "That stuff is for satan worshippers" she is getting the wrong idea of it and witches don't go to hell for being a witch! i wish she would just let me tell her without saying those things and being mad at me...i am a witch but i do not support satan......my parents would scream at me if i told them this
Diana on July 19, 2018:
E.V. (and anyone else who wants to be Wiccan)-
First, you won't go to hell.
Coming to Wicca can be scary for someone who has been Christian -or any other religion - for a majority of their life. You will be doubtful. You will question your new beliefs against your new ones. It's a hard transformation, and if you don't question and doubt, then your probably not really serious about becoming Wiccan.
Keep the Goddess and the God in the loop. Talk to them about how you feel, ask them to guide you on your path. They won't be angry at you for wondering if Wicca is right for you. They are there to help you. Take the time to get to know them.
If Wicca is right for you, you'll know. You'll feel drawn to it. So, right now, just know that doubting, questioning, even being a little bit scared of going to hell, is okay. I promise you that every Wiccan out there has done the same. Open yourself to Wicca and you will find your way.
Alex on July 05, 2018:
Hi, i'm 23 years old Russuian boy.My English is not perfect. So, years showed,it nothing wrong to learn as programmist and artifitial intelligent and study mythology, phylosophy, poetry and acept the mithology of world. So, parents, may believe in Jesus and they will be in Christian Heaven after death. But every person were born from different Gods, personally I was born from fairies and want to be with them after death. Hope that you won't came accross with your future children and be happy)))
Mabelle on June 24, 2018:
Wicca seems very interesting to me, but doesn’t it involve things like tarot cards or anything with physics?
E.V. on June 23, 2018:
I want to be wiccan, but im worried about going to hell. Help.
Alex on June 21, 2018:
Witchcraft doesn't encourage sneaking around??? So the Witches of the Middle Ages just practiced in town square in broad daylight?
And @HelpMePlease, if you were baptized and hate it, reject the oppression of the church by reciting the Lord's Prayer backwards.
HELPMEPLEASE on May 26, 2018:
tommprow im supossed to be baptized into christianity but im a wiccan, help
Diana on May 21, 2018:
To Brooke Shelly- Are you Wiccan because someone in your family is Wiccan/witch? If so, please read this. Just because a relative is a witch doesn’t make you a witch. And many people who are witches are not Wiccan. It’s a choice. You don’t have to be a Wiccan/witch just because someone you know is. Wicca is, and should always be, a practitioners choice, not something they feel obliged to do. If you are Wiccan because you want to be and I’m totally misinterpreting your statement please ignore this comment.
Brooke Shelley on May 16, 2018:
I just found out that I am Wiccan Like two hours ago.
Lacie on May 12, 2018:
So, I was looking at when Litha is this year, and I found that it was on the 21 of June. No problem, except that's when I'm at summer camp. Church camp. How can I celebrate Litha and keep true to myself and my religion, when all around me, people will be worshiping their own god?
Mackenzie Sage Wright (author) on May 02, 2018:
Is it safe? That question always perplexes me, like what do people expect to happen? It's a religion... why do people never wonder why Christianity or Judaism or Buddhism are safe?
Like all religions, Wicca is a way of life, it's a way of connecting to our Gods and trying to improve ourselves and our world... I can't think of any reason why people would think it isn't safe.
If you have some specific worry, maybe you could specify?
And is it real? It is a real religion. There are a lot of real religions... though there is some debate among people about what religions believe being real.
Again, depends on what you already think it is, or what you think it can do. What are you expecting to happen?
I can say that for me, Wicca is very real-- I've learned many lessons, I've developed a relationship with my Gods, I attune with the planet, etc.
Alice on May 01, 2018:
im intrested in wicca but i have two questions is it safe and is it real
Mackenzie Sage Wright (author) on April 29, 2018:
Diana, even the founder of Christian Wicca has backpedaled and admitted that it's really neither. To follow 2 separate religions with two different world views (polytheism vs. monotheism, for example) and two separate goals (salvation vs. balance) simultaneously is not possible.
Of course it's okay to be whatever you want... including if you want to cherry pick elements of Wicca, or elements of Christianity. But if it's misnamed, implying it's a blend of the two when it's really not following either, it just confuses people.
But you're right, no one has to be Christian or Wiccan to practice Witchcraft.
Diana on April 28, 2018:
To LittleMiss: Yes. You can be a Christian and a Wiccan. Look into Christian Wicca. I don’t really know much about it, but it is a thing. If Christian Wicca isn’t your cup of tea, you can always do other things. Ms. Sage’s section in this article on attuning to the Earth is a good place to start, along with bettering yourself. You don’t have to be Wiccan or even a Christian Wiccan to do these things. And if you are Christian and want to be Wiccan, that’s okay to. I was raised in a Christian family, and so were/are a lot of other Wiccans. And those who have posted in under this article are also pretty young. I’m only twelve. So it is possible to be a Wiccan at a young age. If Christianity is right for you, that’s wonderful. Remember, this is your life, so walk your path. I wish you luck.
LittleMiss on April 18, 2018:
hi im still very young almost a teen and i am cristian and thats are enough, can i belive in both?
i know i cant actually be wiccan but can i belive and do some of the things they do while being cristtain?
Mackenzie Sage Wright (author) on April 08, 2018:
Hi Reena; Depends on why. If your parents won't let you bring them in the house, then read books that aren't about Wicca but that will help you learn things a Wiccan needs to know: history, mythology, psychology, meditation, the powers of the mind, etc. When you[re older you can buy what you want.
If you mean you don't have the money, try thrift shops, amazon, etc. for used copies.
If it's some other reason, you'd have to be specific. Good luck to you!
Reena on April 06, 2018:
I can't get my hands on Wiccan books. What can I do?
Ashley on March 23, 2018:
I'm an adult and still hide it from most of my family. My mother knows, my sister knows (and also is pagan), my husband knows, and my MIL has her "suspicions", but I keep telling her I'm Christian because I'm in no mood for a bible lesson. I don't care about what strangers think, I don't even care about what family thinks, but I like to keep the peace, so I hide it. Especially from some older people I am quit close to, but wouldn't understand at all. I do not wish to argue with the elderly, or break their hearts. Some things can be out in the open...plants, certain decor, some books are easy to hide in plain sight. I put a line of salt in the window sills. When asked...it repeals some insects you know, like slugs or anything that doesn't like to be dried out. Most insect die trying to walk through salt. Love the stuff, for many reasons lol. Dream catchers...being part Native American, many in my family love dream catchers. But to them they are only decoration. As long as it doesn't have a star, or other "odd" symbol or something they seen in a halloween movie, lol, they won't question it at all. It's quit easy, for me at least, to hide in plain sight. When you are an adult, you'll be able to do as you please. When you have your own home, you can come out full on, or if you're as close to your family as I am, and do not wish an uproar (because they love you and THINK they know and do the best for you and your soul) then do as I do and hide in plain sight.
This is not for everybody of course, but it works great for me and my sister. I love having her to share with, hiding alone is not good for anybody. It's been a bonding thing for us though, when we found out about each other. Like our own little secret world. "If they love you that much they'll let it go" is not always true. I know my family loves me. They love me so much they would never let it go. They would fear for my soul. I love, and hate, that about them. I don't think they'd stop speaking to me, but it would be a never ending thing between us, even if never spoken of, we'd feel it. I don't like being deceitful, but I'd hate the hurt even more.
Do what you can for now, it'll get easier in time, and you'll figure out what's best for you down the line.
Mackenzie Sage Wright (author) on March 22, 2018:
Thanks for your comments, Diana, not just to me but to everyone. Wise advice; we all find our path, it's a lifelong journey. No rush. :o)
Mackenzie Sage Wright (author) on March 22, 2018:
Hi Logan; hereditary Witchcraft means you were raised in a tradition by your parents/guardians. It sounds like your parents are against the craft, so you might reconsider using the term 'hereditary witch'... but don't worry, 'witch' is just fine, there is no lesser value in it. It just means you have to work a little harder to learn because you didn't get an early start.
If your parents are against Witchcraft, and you're a minor living in their home, it's probably not a good time to start formal practice yet. Keep a journal, meditate, reflect, attune with nature, etc.-- all important things in the Craft. Reading about things like mythology, psychology, botany, gardening, science, different cultures, and other topics are also necessary. But you might want to save formal practice for when you can do it without interference or causing stress on your family.
I know it seems like an eternity to wait, but it's not, and it'll be worth it in the long run to avoid such strife with your loved ones.
Diana on March 22, 2018:
Growing up in a Christian family, I was taught to believe in one god, the devil and hell. But those never made since to me. My teacher assigned me a project on witchcraft for school a few months ago and that is how I came across Wicca. It felt right. I looked into the religion and started praying to the Goddess. After a few weeks though, I stopped because practicing in a Christian household was very complicated. I went back to Christianity for about a month, and then Wicca popped back into my head and I couldn't stop thinking about it. I quickly took up the practice again, and recently celebrated my first Ostara and created a Book of Shadows. I believe that my returning to Wicca was a bit of guidince from the Goddess, for whom I don't yet have a personal name.
To JustWondering: Next time Ostara rolls around you can just do a simple meditation by relaxing and closing your eyes or focusing on a flickering candle (can be battery powered or real). Also, make sure to get outside if the weather allows.
To Logan Weinburg: While I can't help you with your parents, I do have some tips for you. Your BoS doesn't have to be anything fancy. Mine is just a binder with different sections. If your parents won't let you have one, just disguise it as something for school. If Wicca is your belief, keep practicing. It will turn out all right.
To darkwood: You don't have to do all the fancy stuff to practice the Craft. As Ms. Sage said in this article, you can pray to the gods and work on bettering yourself. Luck on your journey.
To Mary: Your story is a lot like mine. Luck on your journey and may the Goddess be with you, Sister.
To Izzy: If Wicca is the path for you, take it and don't be embarrassed. Keep practicing and if your mom forbids it, do what Ms. Sage has suggested. Remember, you are not alone. We are here for you.
To JesusIsLord: Thank you for your opinion. Please respect our beliefs and we will respect yours.
Blessed Be and Merry Part,
Logan Weinberg on March 20, 2018:
Hello my name is logan I’m 14 almost 15 I need help I found out I am a heratiaty witch I’m a male my parents are cristians my grandparents are strict Christians and I would love to tell them that I practice witchcraft but I’m afraid of how they will feel I’m scared to make a book of shadows in case they see it I need help what do I do I can’t stop practicing cause it is my Beliefs
JustWondering on March 18, 2018:
How can I celebrate the upcoming Ostara in my parent's house? They don't want me to be Wiccan. I have an altar set up that they believe is just some cute decorations. I worship the Greek Gods and Goddesses. Any ideas on what I can do?
JesusIsLord on March 16, 2018:
Wicca is the devil's work. Jesus loves you. Repent and be saved.
Mary on March 07, 2018:
I recently learned about Wicca while working on a school project about witchcraft. Wicca felt right for me where my parent's religion of Christianity does not. My mother told me as I was working on the Wiccan portion of the project that she had thought about becoming Wiccan when she was a kid. I was surprised since she is a pastor. I was not surprised when she told me that in my family we must be kind to people of religions like Wicca so that we may try to convert them to Christianity. She said that Wicca was a way for the devil to lure us away from god, and that she had fallen into the trap when she was young. She told me to stay away from Wicca. I disagree with my mother, but now know how she feels about Wicca, and so know that she would be very angry if I told her I wanted to practice. Christianity has always felt wrong, and people shy away when I ask them questions that go deep in to the religion. Your post has really helped me to see ways to practice while I still live under my mother's roof. Thank you for that. I very much agree that my troubles now are a test from the Gods, and love your suggestions about how to better myself. You are a wonderful person to be doing this for young teens like me.
Blessed Be and have a wonderful Ostara.
darkwood on February 26, 2018:
my mom most importantly says that just because someone says its good doesn't mean its true i tell her that its not evil and that i just want to connect with a god or goddess but she say that she doesn't want any spirits or" gods¨ i don't know what to do
Athena on February 05, 2018:
Thank you for this article and comments. I have a very similar story to most of you, and now I don't feel so alone.
Izzy on January 30, 2018:
My parents fond a Wiccan book on iBooks and she asked me and I said it was mine but then she said that witchcraft and magick along with wicca is very dumb and stupid and now I feel embarrassed to tell her that it’s what i Believe in. Idk what to do if anyone could help that would be nice.
Mackenzie Sage Wright (author) on November 28, 2017:
Hi Briar; sorry about your family, but the fact is you can't make your parents understand. They have a different world view and they're not open to learning a new perspective. The more you try, the more likely they will be to dig in their heels and oppose it. The absolute best thing I've come to believe we can do about our family members who disapprove of our spiritual practices is to just not discuss it with them and stay out of their way with it. If they are ever going to accept it, it's something they're going to come to on their own, and trying to make them do that before they're ready just keeps pushing them away.
Best of luck, sweetie :o)
Briar Li on November 28, 2017:
I have a similar problem to Liya, down below. My parents are extremely conservative, but they know about me being a Wiccan witch. They constantly pick on me about it, and it makes me really upset. I am already a member of a coven, and I own a personal BoS. I want them to understand that not all magick is dark. How should I come about it...?
Liya on September 05, 2017:
My mother is a very strict Christan and has always told me to say no to the "dark art" such as witchcraft, Wicca, etc. I am 12 almost 13 and I have a very strong attraction and fascination with Wiccan culture. I have done tons and tons of reading about this religion and when I first looked into to it I was 8 and my mother found out and I got in a load of trouble. I hate to sneak around like this, but I feel that there is much more out there besides things that are believed in with Christianity. I think I have what it takes to be a Wiccan but my mother is strictly against it so what should I do? I have told my mother about Wicca and she forbids any idea of magik. Should I look for a Coven to escape to? Should I disobey my mother? Help!
KittenQueen on March 31, 2017:
I love coming back to this sight I just started Wicca, I used to be Christian and before I really found Wicca I had always felt disturbed almost at church and I think I know why now churches apparently were where Wiccans had circles but Christian's stuck a cross on top and called it a church, so I got really angry at that part and the witch trials some of the people burned weren't even witches (not that I wanted them to be witches either) but some things about Wiccan history just gets under my skin. Also I found my working crystal but I don't know what kind of crystal it is.
Mackenzie Sage Wright (author) on January 17, 2017:
Glad you found it useful; many blessings on your path.
Lannah on December 31, 2016:
I remember years ago, asking my mother if I could practice Witchcraft. I was always fascinating with it, always feeling so drawn to it. At the time, i had no clue about Wicca. But when my mother gave me a very strict NO, I couldn't obey. I was in the beginning of my teen years and I was stubborn. I discovered Wicca and researched, reading as much as I could. I even created a grimoire of information. I wasn't as enchanted by spells at that point, but with all the information I was reading.
It's been about ten years and I still haven't told my mother. I'm sure she suspects maybe a little, but we haven't discussed it. The way I feel about it is that it's personal.
I lost my Catholic faith, got lost in darkness, and saw something so horrifying. I know you don't believe in demons, but I do. Not just because my previous faith. I chose Wicca to give me the enlightenment I needed, and because it felt like the destination of my journey.
I haven't told anyone of my faith and I know many say that if it's kept a secret, it's because you know it's wrong. It's not true. I don't advertise it because it's personal. I know it doesn't sound good, not letting others get to know all of who I am, but I need to do it in my own time and I haven't felt that yet.
I thank you because this article makes me look back on myself at that age, thinking that I could have done that if I wasn't so stubborn. I hid my grimoire, my pentacle necklace and my tarot cards (even if my mother saw me buying them and said nothing).
Mackenzie Sage Wright (author) on August 13, 2016:
Hi Liz; I'm so sorry you're struggling with finding peace. Meditation can take time, and can help with issues like depression and anxiety, but it makes it all the more challenging to get started. Guided meditations to help keep you focused on something positive might help; there are many on Youtube though it's probably best to start with brief ones and work your way toward lengthening them.
Mackenzie Sage Wright (author) on August 13, 2016:
Hi Chry, I'm so sorry you are in a place where people are not understanding of your beliefs, and I don't blame you for being scared. I wish I could tell you some easy thing to do to make it better, but it's just not that easy a world. You might want to simply keep your beliefs private and disguised to protect your own safety; what you believe is personal, you don't owe anyone an explanation.
I know that can get a bit lonely; perhaps someday you'll consider a move to a place that is more open and accepting toward your beliefs, but for now just protect yourself.
Liz Himebaugh on April 14, 2016:
Hi! I have to say, this was very sad to hear/read. I'm 16, and have been drawn to "magic" ever since I can remember. I never truly understood it until a while back. I fully plan on joining a cult when I turn 18, or finding a mentor. I live with my mother and brother-both devout Christians. While it was saddening to read that I can't get any help from someone who is experienced, it was also enlightening to read the comments. I don't feel so alone now, and you have also made me realize what I needed to. Wicca isn't just about spells and cults. It's a religion, and it should be treated as such. I fully plan on creating a relationship with the Spirits (God and Goddess). However, meditating is hard for me. I have so many distractions in my life. I've been clinically diagnosed with severe depression and anxiety, as well as Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. (This has gotten so bad, I can't tell what's actually real sometimes.) I own an amethyst crystal that sometimes helps calm my nerves whenever I try to meditate, but most of the time I can't focus. I don't feel at peace and I don't feel any Divine light come over me. I just feel alone. If you have any help with this, please help me. I'm dedicated to becoming Wiccan and being more in-tune with the earth and spirits. Thank you.
ChryseousLunaria on February 26, 2016:
And also wiccan here in our country, oftenly associated to demonic practices and we are also considered as spawn of the demon. So I am really scared. I need answers from you. And if you want to see 'bout our history in wiccan here, you can search "mangkukulam" in Google.
ChryseousLunaria on February 26, 2016:
Hello WiccanSage, I am very proud of being a Wiccan and happy in taking my spiritual path, I am 18 years old. But the thing is, here in my country , Philippines, Wicca does not have a good reputation, people here often accuse wiccans as bad persons, sinners, killers and plauge bringers. I am very scared. Even my family don't want my religion. What should I do? Surely, other people will be mad at me if they know what my religion is.
Mackenzie Sage Wright (author) on September 01, 2015:
Hi Pastel Rose; I know it can be hard when your parents disagree with something you feel strongly about. I hope you are able to talk to them soon and come to some kind of peaceful agreement.
Pastel Rose on August 17, 2015:
My parent will find out some time soon I bet. They started getting suspicious when I didn't want to be confirmed as a Methodist
Mackenzie Sage Wright (author) on March 03, 2015:
Hi Kimbrly; nothing wrong with going to church. I hope you can find some useful ideas in this article to help channel your interests.
BlueJay on December 13, 2014:
Three months later... Sorry about that, but I was on my phone when I read your last response and for some reason it didn't want to let me do a comment that day. But I realized this evening, I didn't say thank you. So thank you, a lot, for what you said about my name. I hadn't known that before, and I think it helped me to learn it. So thanks.
Mackenzie Sage Wright (author) on December 10, 2014:
Hi Moon & Sun, I am sure your parents are wonderful parents. They are doing what they think is best for you... but even the best of parents can be mistaken about something. They don't understand what Wicca is. That's not a crime-- it just is going to make it a bit hard for you. I am glad you found some help in this article. Bright blessings on your path, sweetie.
Moon&Sun on November 11, 2014:
Oh, and I truly don't mean to sound ungrateful, my parents are wonderful people. My only issue is that they are forcing me to make confirmation, even though I don't belive in the Christian beliefs, and this just rubbed me the wrong way, so to speak.
Moon&Sun on November 11, 2014:
I'd like to thank you for writing this article. It is very uplifting and makes me feel better about my parents veiw of wicca. Recently I've been feeling like the goddess is urging me to tell my parents about what I belive, so I did. It went as badly as I imagined it would. My mom started lecturing me and looking at me with utter disgust. I was absolutely horrified and extremely hurt. She started bashing wicca and at this point I was on the verge of tears, it was even worse because I thought she would be understanding. It got to the point that I had to leave the room a bit and go outside. When I came back in, I convinced my mom that I was 'only kidding', even though the words tasted bitter on my tounge. I'm scared that if I tell my mom the truth, she'll never take me seriously again. I'm surprised she hasn't taken me to counseling yet, and she was about five seconds away from driving me to the nearest Christian church, to make me 'repent for my sins' when I told her I wanted to be Wiccan. I know, in my heart, that the god and goddess wouldn't want me to live a lie, and while I fully intend to take the advice offered in this column, I was wondering if you can offer any advice on this situation. Mind you, I am only fourteen, and have been officially practicing Wicca for a year, but I have been drawn to this path since I was five years old, and only recently have I learned of its name. Oh, and I haven't told my dad of my beliefs yet, but I have mentioned wicca and the first words that came out of his mouth were, "That stupid cult? I don't want you to be asociated with it."
Mackenzie Sage Wright (author) on August 23, 2014:
Hi hon; I'm so sorry about the problems you're having at home. I remember how hard it is being a teen, I try to remember this with my own kids and to keep an open mind with them.
It's interesting you call yourself blue jay; blue jays symbolize having a connection between the divine and the mundane, the Earth and the heavens, keeping them in balance. I'm thinking that this says a lot about you, and how you're able to put your practices into your everyday life-- even if you can't call it what it really is, you're still using it.
BlueJay on August 21, 2014:
I get that. Or, I want to. I guess it just rubs me the wrong way that even doing this stuff, they praise me for it cause it's "healthy physical activity" and away from the computer, but if I mentioned that "Hey I'm actually doing this because, you remember that conversation we had where you yelled at me a lot? Yeah, I'm still doing that" then I would most likely be banned from the same thing I'm being praised for. I guess I'm lucky though, I only have two years to wait.
Mackenzie Sage Wright (author) on August 21, 2014:
I understand hon, I really do. But everything listed here is more of what being Wiccan is actually about than any spell you can cast or any flashy tools you can lay out on an altar. The question comes down to these:
- Do you want to be Wiccan, or do you want to look Wiccan?
- Do you want a spiritual path? Or do you want to cast spells and brandish tools?
If you want to be Wiccan, if you want a spiritual path, the things listed here are actually more important than the tools and the spells. They are more what life-long Wiccans do and live in their everyday lives between monthly rituals and sabbats. These are what's at the heart of Wicca, the kind of things I had my own daughter doing, even though she was being raised a Wiccan.
If I had to choose between spells and tools and all outward signs of Wicca, and the things I listed here, I'd go with the things I listed here. So I'm not just trying to pacify teens who don't have understanding parents... I'm trying to show you that Wicca is a real spiritual path, and there's a lot more to being Wiccan than just laying tools on an altar and casting spells. It is a lifestyle, and it is a lifestyle of learning, attuning, being ethical and fostering a spiritual relationship with your Gods.
If that's not enough for you, then maybe you want to re-think what you think Wicca is. I understand how hard it is when your parents don't allow you the freedom to explore and try things for yourself, but really the things listed here are among the most important things any Wiccan can be doing, so you're not being as short-changed as you thought.
BlueJay on August 20, 2014:
Please don't get me wrong, I appreciate the tips for if your parents aren't... open to the idea of their child not being the perfect little Christian. It just feels a bit too much like being told that another door is slamming in my face just because I'm too young to appreciate anything, even though I know that's not how it's meant to look. Sound. Read? One of those things. Anyway. Thanks for at least something I can do for the 2ish years until I'm legally allowed to decide for myself.
Mackenzie Sage Wright (author) on August 10, 2014:
Kaylee on August 05, 2014:
Mackenzie Sage Wright (author) on July 26, 2014:
Hi Kaylee, thanks for your thoughtful comment. I think it is important to embrace and follow what you believe, whether it's a religion (like Christianity, or Wicca), or whether it's just 'marching to the beat of your own drum.' You are right, that it's important to use them as tools to open ourselves and evolve rather than to get so buried by them that we are blinded and closed off. There is nothing wrong with being an observer, it's actually a quality I admire. Observers are living in the moment, they notice things others don't know. There's nothing wrong with having a unique perspective. Bright blessings, friend.
Kaylee on July 25, 2014:
Well here is the back when my mom was a teen she believed in all things wicca, and most she still dose. most of my family is excepting, but some are not as open. i haven't said any thing yet but i just dont know how to go about things... People have always said i have a unusual way of looking at things. Some times i feel like its an insult. like im the only on who could ever be open to thinking freely. Religion blinds people to what they could be and most makes some resistant to change and exception. i don't want to be like that... And some times i just dont know where i would be welcomed when i question things i probably shouldn't. Its just the way i am. i don't know if anyone out there can tell just how much you can know by siting and watching... In band they actually refer to someone siting quietly in the back of the room as being a kaylee, and i dont like that. I believe that everyone believes in some thing... if they can why cant i?
Mackenzie Sage Wright (author) on April 05, 2014:
Glad you found it useful, Julianna. Good luck with your search and finding your true path.
Julianna Holloway on April 05, 2014:
This helped me a lot, for the past few weeks I've been searching what religion I should be, and I'm 12-years-old, so there's many options. My family are all Christian or witnesses and I learned about Mother Nature and I've believed in her since and I thought there wasn't a religion that would involve her, and yet here it is! Thanks again, I learned a lot from this and hopefully I'll dedicate myself to being Wiccan. Blessed be.
Mackenzie Sage Wright (author) on August 05, 2013:
LOL that's really interesting Nell Rose; my parents were very wary of Witchcraft, yet my grandparents and their siblings all came from Italy in the late 1800s and they all practiced exactly what we call Witchcraft today. So basically, I could follow along with the family folk magic and that was okay-- just don't call it Witchcraft!
Nell Rose from England on August 05, 2013:
Great advice Wiccan, I remember buying all my own books when I was a teen, my whole bookcase was full of psychic stuff, and of course pagan or wiccan, my mum didn't mind but she was a bit wary of it, but the joke was that she was the witch! lol! long story!