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Gardener Makes Case for Why Potatoes Are the Most "Goth" of All Vegetables

I dig it.

I’ve never thought of gardening as a particularly goth pastime, but that may be short-sighted of me. After all, you’re working in the dirt, with dead things like compost, and worms, and you have to deal with the entire cycle of life.

This gardener on Twitter is making the case that not only can gardening be goth, but that some types of gardening are supremely goth. And, to be honest, her argument makes a lot of sense.

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First of all, potatoes hate sunlight. Right off the bat, it’s got a touch of the macabre. To plant potatoes, you take spuds, which are old, chopped-up corpses of other potatoes, and bury them deep in the dirt. “You plant them with the eyes facing up, before shoveling dirt on top of them," points out writer Jennifer Hudak. "If you want, you can imagine those eyes peering through the darkness, tracking the worms tunneling through the soil.”

Getting creepy vibes yet? Wait, there’s more!

Even once the new plants have sprouted out of the desiccated bodies of the old, they crave darkness. Bury the green shoots again—alive—leaving only a few green leaves poking out of the top. (This is called “hilling.”)

Then, you wait for the potato plants themselves to die, brown, and shrivel. Only then do you know your crop is ready.

Dig into the soil and exhume your potatoes. But make sure to keep them in the dark, like the vegetal vampires they are.

And of course, always keeping mind hat you didn’t get all of them. Some potatoes yet lay forgotten, deep within the soil. Waiting.