Andrea has a background in astrology, Myers Briggs, and pop culture with expertise in relationships and dating.
Understanding the Chaos That Is Aquarius
Aquarius is a fantastic sign. Those born under this Sun sign are known for their intelligence, their utopian ideals, their beauty, their whimsy, and their weirdness. The fixed air sign is powerful and wonderful, but as with any sign, they have their struggles. Most of the Aquarian struggle has to do with misconception.
They want to have friends. They also want to amount to something. They feel a certain wild energy in their minds. They often don’t feel like they fit in with others.
This revolutionary sign is all about progress, and they have some of the most liberal views of the zodiac. They can feel threatened and out of place around people who are far more conservative than them. They have a strong need to be expressive and smart. They fear they are unintelligent.
40 Common Struggles for Aquarius
Please take the following struggles with a grain of salt. The following are common issues that come up for Aquarius types, but they are not guaranteed issues.
1. They Can Seem Aloof.
The Aquarius most likely doesn’t know that people consider them aloof. They’re jumping from one context to the next with lightning speed, and they don’t realize they’re leaving people behind. Aquarius is decisive and stubborn, so they show up and get stuff done, but they have a tendency to leave people in the dust.
They don’t always share what’s on their hearts and minds. Sometimes their distance leaves people with questions.
2. They Are Often Misunderstood.
When you have the capacity to be a genius or revolutionary, people don’t always connect with you or understand you. This is the unfortunate part about being a leader . . . people don’t always get why someone is bucking the trend.
Aquarius types will have to go through parts of their lives trying to fit in, and in some cases, they’re going to suck at it. They’re often misunderstood when they try to blend.
Aquarius also has a lot of thoughts and ideas, and it takes someone astute or understanding to really connect with those ideas — especially with a young Aquarius who is in the early stages of learning how to communicate.
3. They Appear Emotionally Distant.
It’s a misconception that Aquarius types don’t have emotions. They just have really good self-control and self-monitoring.
Aquarius types have a really good poker face if they want to have a poker face. They know how to mask their emotions, making it difficult to read them. The sign is often described as a cipher.
Regardless of their self-control, they can also be emotionally loud. Think of it this way: they are the water bearers — they know how to spread the water and make ripples. Water in astrology is a symbol for emotions.
Aquarius is emotionally diverse, one of the most emotionally diverse of the zodiac. They’re focused on the future and want a better planet. Sometimes Aquarius clicks better with Cancer, Scorpio, and Pisces than their air cousins.
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Aquarius and Pisces do share a role in bringing all of us to the next celestial plane, so it would make sense that they have a strong bond. Neighbor signs tend to get along.
4. Stubborn to a Fault.
As a fixed sign, Aquarius has a hard time changing their mind. Once Aquarius has decided on a path, they will do everything in their power to make it happen. They’ll have to learn some malleability as they get older and that sometimes they are wrong.
Aquarius types don’t realize they’re stubborn most of the time. And it might not be obvious to you that your Aquarius friend is stubborn. Once they lock in on a goal, they’ll sink their teeth into it. Getting them to change their mind is like trying to get a tiger to let go of a juicy steak.
5. They Are Prone to Anxiety.
When you have a great deal of air, you also are more prone to anxiety. The air signs all have rich internal monologue. They have trouble with racing thoughts that keep them up at night. They constantly are trying to think their way through life. When their internal monologue becomes sour it can translate into anxiety.
Aquarius has to master their racing thoughts and be at peace with their mind; otherwise, the dark side of their psyche will get to them. It’s important to nudge your thoughts in the right direction and be direct with your thought stream.
6. Impostor Syndrome.
A genius doesn’t really think they’re smart; a fool applauds their own thoughts.
- A genius is aware that there is a probability that they’re wrong.
- An Aquarius may know they have brains, but they’re worried they’ll make a blunder.
- They have awareness of the self, which causes them to wonder if they’re actually fooling people with their words and actions.
- They’re not really sure they’re as smart as people believe.
- They wonder if they have led people to think they’re smart when they’re actually mediocre or ill-equipped.
- They’re not really sure what kind of growth people want out of them or what kind of potential they have.
7. Tendency Toward Paranoia.
Sleep paralysis, fear, chaos, and anxiety all kind of reign on high for an Aquarius, especially when they’re young or if they were raised in a religious family.
Aquarius types are prone to sleep paralysis in part because they have bad sleep practices. They stay up late to think, and then they get up early to go to work or school.
8. Burnout Leading to Depression.
Aquarius needs to be different. They need to have room to grow. They don’t do well in a world bent on mediocrity, beige walls, and cube-shaped buildings. This is a bright and powerful sign, but society often tries to bully them into complacency, submission, and orthodoxy. When an Aquarius has to forfeit their unique personality, it will inevitably turn into depression.
Aquarius needs a place where they feel they belong, but they’re not meant to assimilate.
9. Noticeable Social Awkwardness.
The Aquarius is a social chameleon. They’ll eventually learn the charisma to fit into any situation, or at least fit into a situation at the level of their own comfortability.
The Aquarius first has to be awkward to figure out how to be charismatic. This sign will absorb as much as it possibly can from others, observing their every interaction, and watching television and movies to figure out how people function.
Aquarius in their youth may be very awkward; they may continue to be very awkward as adults if they so chose. But they also could mature into social masters. Aquarius teens are really strange.
10. Eccentric in Ways That Annoy People.
An Aquarius will most likely be called weird growing up. They’re going to do things that don’t fit social norms.
Aquarius will be called out for eccentric behavior, and they’ll be mocked for trivial things. This sign is independent and wants to do life their way. They’ll dance to the beat of their own harpsichord. They’ll invent songs for mermaids to lure in Vikings.
All their inner brightness, stubbornness, genius, and idealism will come together to make a person that looks very weird to others. If you’re an Aquarius person, try to see your charms as Aces and not shortcomings.
11. Lost in Their Own World.
The Aquarius likes to escape reality and live in a kind of fiction. They want some fantasy. They want something exciting. They can zone out and live inside their own head creating beautiful stories, images, and the like. They have beautiful imaginations, but when you’re always living inside your head, you don’t always get chores and tasks done.
The Aquarius detests the mundane, which can include anything from filing property taxes to getting an oil change. They have to teach themselves how to make the most boring things interesting. They’re on the hunt for juicy details.
12. They Can Be Know-It-Alls.
Don’t get too upset about this if you’re an Aquarius. You have a great brain, you’ve filled it up with wisdom, knowledge, and trivia. The people around you have noticed, and some of them are annoyed with you or are jealous of your natural talent to learn new things.
You can sometimes come off as the insufferable know-it-all who likes to solicit advice for any cause. Instead, keep quiet and let people live their lives. Watch people’s facial reactions and the timing of things to see if you’re coming off amicable or as a pest.
Because the Aquarius can jump from context to context with lightning speed, they can emotionally recover really fast. They can sort through emotions in a split second.
It can be challenging for others to understand Aquarius because they don’t go through a patchwork of emotions with such speed and dexterity. They may not understand your emotional quirks and how the heck you do that. They may not find you genuine because you emotionally process freakishly fast.
14. Impulsivity With Money.
Air is the opposite of earth. Aquarius likes the abstract and isn’t always grounded. They don’t always have the best ideas when it comes to money. They find some disciplines with finances incredibly boring. They’re also not a super serious type.
They’re forward-thinking people and have more brain power for virtue, progress, social change, creativity, and thought creation. Counting money is a wee bit laborious. They also have a tendency to impulsively buy things. They need more conservative and grounded tactics to protect their funds.
15. Trouble Staying Clean.
Chores are another thing that Aquarius types often find boring and take away from other things they would rather be doing.
Maybe they threatened their parents when they were little that they would hire a maid, so they wouldn’t have to clean their room themselves.
Aquarius has to make time for physical reality. At some point, you have to put in the effort to mop the floors, wash the dishes, do the laundry, and clean out the cat boxes.
Aquarius CAN be good at cleaning, but they have to apply themselves. They’re more likely to focus on getting creative tasks done like writing short stories, learning a language, or learning a new instrument.
16. Lack of Focus.
At some point, Aquarius will have many talents and hobbies, but they don’t have enough time to nourish all of them. This can be frustrating for Aquarius who wants to perfect several talents all at once.
It can be challenging to pick which abilities to grow and which ones to put on pause. There isn’t enough time in a day for an Aquarius to do all the things they love, so they end up sacrificing sleep, which then turns into paranoia, sleep paralysis, and nightmares.
Striking a balance can be hard, but on the bright side, Aquarius is known for their balancing acts.
17. They Can Be Reclusive and Not Date Anyone . . . Or They Wildly Date Everyone.
Aquarius is the type to believe there is a soul mate for them. They’ll pine for someone with all the power of unrequited love. They can be very passionate about their crush without ever really having any forward motion.
They can also eschew the idea of a soul mate; instead, they’ll wildly take on as many partners as possible and get lost in a whirlwind of parties and absurdities. They have a tough time balancing out their romantic desires.
18. They Hate Office Jobs.
It’s not just office jobs, but any job that is repetitive and constraining. They hate having to assimilate. It really takes the energy out of them. They hate office politics, they hate how mean people are to each other, and they hate having to waste time on a job that feels pointless.
It’s easier now than ever to be your own boss or work freelance. You don’t have to put up with that boss who is most definitely dumber than you.
19. Plenty of Social Acquaintances, Not Enough Close Friends.
You get along with everybody, but you also feel like you’re not close to anyone. You don’t feel like you’re the first choice for anybody. You get invited to a lot of weddings, but you’re never part of the bridal party.
You get relegated out of close, tight-knit circles — and you’re not really sure why. You’re an edge piece for a puzzle, not a piece in the center.
20. Compulsive Activity.
There is a hanging sword over Aquarius’ head: you haven’t done enough.
They worry they didn’t write enough on their exam. They worry they haven’t done a strong enough argument. They give 150% and then some because they’re worried they just haven’t done enough.
They are constantly thinking about what they should do next; they’re chasing after the wind to try and fill a void. They want experiences and forward momentum, and they’ll do what it takes to feel like they’re getting somewhere.
21. Burdened by Hyperactivity.
With a little caffeine, you become a magical zooming fairy capable of accomplishing anything.
- You have an incredible mind and because of this, you have a great deal of energy.
- You can literally burst through a wall if you so desire.
- You may have gotten in trouble when you were a kid for being demonstrative, showy, too much, annoying, or funny.
- You have so much energy, and as an adult when people say they wish they had energy like when they were young — you’re just sitting there pretending that you don’t. You’re aware of the chaotic energy inside you.
- You feel like there is a little person inside your head constantly doing jumping jacks and cartwheels.
22. Arguing Until the End of Time.
It is really stupid for someone to argue with an Aquarius. They have the stamina to continue arguing indefinitely. They’ll sacrifice their sleep if they need to make their point. They never stop thinking. They could write a novel in a week.
Even worse, they gain more knowledge while they talk to you. They have epiphanies mid-conversation. They will absorb everything you’re saying and figure out what is the objective truth. They enjoy being argument detectives. The only reasons they don’t get into long tirades are (1) it might not be the best use of their time and energy, and (2) because they don’t want to bother someone with a long conversation that could jeopardize their friendship.
23. Quiet for the Sake of Preserving Friendship
The Aquarius type worries that if they bother you too much, you won’t like them anymore. They literally pause friendships for this reason. They may stop contacting you and hope you’ll contact them. They freeze things because they think it is a sane choice and will help maintain the friendship. They don’t want to harm a connection, but they do harm it by a lack of maintenance.
24. Social Media Addiction.
Aquarius loves to watch people. They can jump into an argument and write a precise rebuttal to some insane person who believes in a conspiracy theory.
They can literally waste their lives on social media when they could be doing better things with their time. An Aquarius needs to teach themselves that social media is idle play. They should focus more on their chores and finances instead. Meet friends in person or pick up the phone. Social media is a weak way to maintain bonds.
25. Overly Critical.
Aquarius can precisely analyze what is going on around them and what is wrong. They can give impeccable feedback. They know exactly how to rewrite a bad short story. They’re very good at troubleshooting things around them, but they can also put their foot in their mouth. They need to be careful about passing judgment. They don’t want to overwhelm people with salt. They need to figure out how to gingerly tell people difficult things.
Aquarius: you don’t always need to be sharp like a knife.
26. Overly Defensive.
Sometimes the Aquarius cannot take negative feedback. They’ll defend themselves and come up with excuses for their negligible behavior. They can come up with a beautiful excuse in seconds because they’re smart. They may on the surface take ownership of something, but below the surface, they’re seething.
27. Giving up When No Longer Feeling Passionate.
Aquarius has to feel they really love something, or they give up on it. If they don’t like a particular subject or it seems too hard, and they don’t have good support, then they’ll toss something out and look for something else.
There is some wisdom in knowing when it is time to quit, but don’t quit too early. Sometimes you have to tolerate mild disappointment or slow progress.
28. Overwhelmed and Unresponsive.
When you have a pile of thoughts that must be processed, when you have a pile of tasks that must be done, and when you have a pile of dreams that need momentum — it can all get overwhelming rather quickly.
Aquarius and her constant need to accomplish and be on the “go” can overwhelm her circuits. She doesn’t always need to do everything or at her best level. She may be trying too hard. Fortunately, the Aquarius is open-minded and willing to relax. Aquarius doesn’t always have to be performing; they can take a nap.
They may show up one day in a dress with bells on it. They may spend their money to make pigs fly over New York City. The Aquarius may speak in riddles, leave behind little golden treasures in cups, or wear pirate clothes.
They have a deep love of the weird. They may make some very odd and spectacular choices. They may seem like a character that has somehow escaped Dr. Seuss’ mind.
Just be careful. People might relegate you into the not-serious pile.
30. Always Needing to Look Gorgeous.
Look, Aquarius types are for the most part naturally beautiful. They take a lot of pride in their locks, their poised hands, and anything else that the genetic lottery has bestowed to them.
The Aquarius wants to look good and be attractive. They may waste time trying to find the perfect fitting hat, getting the absolute correct shade of lipstick, and the finest curl. They want to look like they were born from a star, not planet Earth. They want to shine bright like a diamond, and sometimes there just isn’t time for that. Sometimes they just need to wear their old sneakers and go buy milk. Not every day is meant to be outstanding.
A popular symbol for air signs are swords. Sometimes Gemini, Libra, and Aquarius must learn how to use the sword to defend themselves and others. You can use a sword as a shield.
Aquarius wants to be different. They want to amaze. They want to start a revolution, so they can be a bit of a rebel. When they don’t know where to go, they can be destructive and disruptive. They want to rebel against stupidity, they want to rebel against Karens, they want to rebel against traditions.
Takeaway: Aquarius wants to make real change in the world, but their desire to make change isn’t always welcome.
32. Desire to Usurp Power.
Okay, so if you’re a rebel your end game is to usurp power in some form. Maybe you hated your teacher and the way she so painfully led the classroom. Maybe your boss is a tyrant who is a conservative nut job. You have enemies because there are awful people on this planet. You want to change the power structure — and often for good reasons.
You have to think carefully about usurping power because it could mean you want to be a boss — but do you really? That could eat up your time.
33. Debilitating Procrastination.
You know you have important things to do. You know you should write those thank you cards. But you do everything in your power to delay what doesn’t have to immediately be done.
You should schedule things out. You should use a calendar. You can’t always be a leader and try to make big sweeping changes. Sometimes you have to be an organizer and the manager of your keep.
34. Dreaming and Never Doing.
It does not bode well to constantly be dreaming but never living. You should strive to engage in reality and make your dreams come true.
Don’t always hide in your amazing imagination. Don’t let life sneak by without making some impact. Just as you shouldn’t skip sleep, don’t sleep away your life either.
35. Laughing Too Much.
Genius people get humor. They like to laugh. They find many things funny, but sometimes when you laugh too much, people take offense. Make sure you’re in the right crowd when you relax and let out your laughs. Sure, some people find laughter attractive. Other people are insecure and think you’re making fun of them. (Watch your wit.)
When you are smart, you can get very passionate about your ideas. You may feel that your way is the truth and the only truth. You can become fixated on what is correct for society and what is wrong. You can come off high and mighty.
Fortunately, Aquarius types can be open-minded. They like ideas and absorbing new information. You’re compassionate and have a backbone made of the finest material: empathy.
You can take on new ideas. You’re willing to learn where you are wrong. You can find grace. So be careful not to become too obsessed with your viewpoint.
You’re a lot of a person. You have any number of strengths and weaknesses. People are not necessarily sure what version of you will come into play at any point. This can cause people to not know whether or not they can depend on you.
They’re not really sure you’re stable. They’re scared of you because you’re immense.
38. Inability to Let Go.
Probably the hardest part of being an Aquarius is that you have a high capacity for memory. You don’t really let things go. You have salvaged your memory. You hold grudges. You even hold grudges against yourself. It’s hard for you to learn how to really forgive someone.
You like boundaries. You don’t mind putting up walls between you and an accuser. You can get really stuck in the past and fret over a grievance. Guilt weighs very heavily for this type.
39. Constant Need for Stimulation.
This may seem repetitive overall, but you don’t do well with the milquetoast.
- You require color in your world.
- You require randomness, unpredictability, strangeness, uniqueness, the new, the unprecedented, and the novel.
- You have a hard time sitting still, especially in your mind. You are constantly on the go in your head.
- You tune out boring things.
- You don’t like to process boring things.
Due to the high need for stimulation, you don’t always see why something is important to others. You can mock something that others find noble and true or worth their time.
You may really dislike football but that doesn’t mean you need to tell football fans they’re ridiculous for enjoying the sport.
The world doesn’t revolve around you. Progress and the utopian ideal don’t happen just because of you. You need to see yourself as simple and mortal. You’re not THAT important. All fixed signs have this problem to some degree.
This article is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge. Content is for informational or entertainment purposes only and does not substitute for personal counsel or professional advice in business, financial, legal, or technical matters.
© 2021 Andrea Lawrence